6 Practical Steps To Build Confidence

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As much as many of us may not want to admit it, self-doubt is something we all experience. Whether you’re stepping into a new role, starting a new business, or just trying to navigate day-to-day life, it’s that small voice that questions your worth, your abilities, and your decisions—and often at the most inopportune times. I’ve struggled with it for most of my life. It’s shown up in my work, in school, and even in my personal growth. But self-doubt doesn’t have to hold us back. In fact, learning to face it head-on is where we begin to really reclaim our power.

I’m speaking from experience. In 2022, when I took on my first director role, self-doubt was practically my personal assistant. Despite being qualified, I felt like a fraud, questioning my place almost every other day. Then in 2023, I made one of the scariest decisions of my life—I left digital media after 15 years and launched my wellness practice. Once again, that familiar feeling of doubt crept in. Could I really build something from scratch? Could I succeed in an industry I was still figuring out? Would people listen to me, trust me, or even believe in what I had to offer?

Self-doubt isn’t just about the fears we carry within ourselves; it’s also shaped by the world around us. For me, as a new wellness practitioner, there were moments when I felt like I didn’t belong—like my voice was being policed or ignored. I wrote about this in a recent Substack newsletter, sharing how I often felt like I was facing obstacles as a Black and queer practitioner that others, especially those who didn’t look like me, weren’t. This sense of “otherness” created the perfect breeding ground for imposter syndrome. Despite being more than qualified to teach, I constantly questioned whether I truly belonged in spaces that weren’t designed with people like me in mind.

And then there’s the exhaustion of always being hyper-aware of how I speak, how I present myself, and how I’m perceived. It’s real, and it’s something I think many Black and brown practitioners face but rarely talk about. The emotional and spiritual labor of being “the only one” in predominantly white spaces takes its toll. But all of these challenges have also been my teachers, pushing me to grow, confront my doubts, and step into the fullness of who I am—regardless of what the world tells me.

The thing is, self-doubt is a part of the human experience. It doesn’t go away just because we reach a certain milestone or achieve success. Instead, we learn to manage it, confront it, and ultimately, use it as a tool for growth. Here are some of the things I’ve learned along the way that have helped me move through self-doubt and toward a place of trust in myself and my journey.

1. Acknowledge Your Doubts, But Don’t Stay for Tea

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Shout out to a former therapist for this one. The first step to overcoming self-doubt is simply acknowledging it. It’s so easy to ignore or push those feelings aside, but they only get louder when we do that. So when doubt creeps in, I take a moment to sit with it. What’s really at the root of these feelings? Is it fear of failure, fear of judgment, or something else? By naming it, I take away its power over me. And then, I challenge it. Is this doubt rooted in truth, or is it just a story I’ve been telling myself? Once I can separate the truth from the fear, I can leave it where it’s at and start moving forward with more clarity—no need to sit and kiki with it.